Retreating

I am sitting in the Beijing airport trying to get back to Harbin. Unfortunately, due to a series of canceled and re-scheduled flights, its going to be a long wait. I've heard it is really cold in Harbin. I am bracing myself, but really looking forward to returning to the quiet life that accompanies studying rice.

I spent the first few days of this week attending the Northeast Asia Economic Forum. It was a big conference with a lot of speakers. The day after the conference ended, all of the young people who had been part of the workshop got together to process and discuss the forum. Here is what I learned.

Americans are loud. About 30+ people from the workshop sat in a classroom and we gave group presentations. When the organizers tried to get us to use microphones, all of the Americans refused to use them. Each of the groups had an American in it. All of the Americans talked for our groups, myself included. After a couple of weeks of sitting around listening to talks, we had decided it was time to be heard. We summarized and critiqued what we had seen at the Forum, offered suggestions to improve the workshop for the next year, and pretty much led the last day of discussions. I observed (and participated in) this phenomenon with another American. She observed that yes we are loud, but we also get things done. In a sense, Americans are an authority figure, even just as workshop participants.

The workshop had about 33 participants from 6 countries (S. Korea, Japan, China, Mongolia, Russia, USA). The US is the one country that is a geographical stretch. But its inclusion in the region represents the broader and stronger political economic relations the US has. Of the 5 Americans, 3 of us are currently living in an Asian country and the other ones have previously and/or may in the future (well, if Josh is reading this, he's the exception to all rules). The US is involved in this region because our foreign policy. In the most general sense, we show up at conferences and meetings to listen and observe. After we have listened and observed, we insert ourselves into the situation and become an authority. At this basic workshop of graduate students and young professionals, the US presence was undeniable. From keeping up with current events in the world, I imagine its like that at a much larger scale as well. For better or for worse, Americans live in a privileged position in the world where authority is granted to us based on our nationality. We use this authority to make things happen.

I came to China first as a Peace Corps volunteer and now as an (aspiring) academic so I could both be a part of, but also be removed from, the world of international politics. I want to see and understand what happens in the rest of the world through processes of economic development, financial integration, and free trade. But I don't want to be directly involved in it because I understand the biases that one brings to a situation when working on behalf of a government or some other organization. Of course, I am not free from this at all by being an academic. But when I get a little closer to understanding how world politics operates, I want to distance myself. Whether what I am doing works or doesn't work, I don't want to be the American who comes in and gets the job done.

So I continue to wait to board my plane to return to Harbin where I can continue my role as an observer in the world of northeast rice. I don't have to lead any more discussions and try to get my beliefs across for a while. The workshop was a good break and a reality check from life in Harbin. But I am ready to go back and be quiet for a while.